It was just as hard as previous times, but perhaps I wanted it more and so it was easier to stick with. ..
Perhaps by putting out in the Cyberspace land via blogging and Facebook it would have been too humiliating to quit. . .
Or maybe I liked the compliments I was getting from people.Or perhaps I liked the feeling of "clean eating" as I ditched soda (other than occasionally drinking it if going out for dinner) and got away from the frozen WW or Lean Cuisine meals in exchange for fresher and less processed foods.
Or maybe I liked getting all the little stickers and claps at the WW meetings every time I would lose.
Or maybe it was going from a 44 DD bra to a 38/40 C/D (depending on where I got it) and going from a size 18/20 pants to a 12/14.
Or maybe it was just all of those things together that kept me going 100% PERFECTLY from November to April.
Then BOOM. . .I was no longer perfect. I was lucky enough to get to be a chaperon on my daughter's 4th grade field trip to the Grand Canyon and while I didn't consume all the junk food that was surrounding me, I didn't track and didn't eat 100% perfectly. And for me, that started a slippery slope of watching what I was eating, but not tracking and therefore, really having no clue how much I was or was not eating. Fortunately I was still working out 3-4 times a week.
I didn't skip WW meetings, I still went and I would gain 2 and lose 1, gain 1.5 and lose .25 and soon my all time low of 152.2 started creeping up and up and by the end of May it was 157. I got my tush into gear and by June it was back down to 154 and then summer camp for my daughter began. And then we hosted teenagers from Israel for 2 weeks. And then my daughter became immersed in the world of musical theater as she went to dance workshops, an audition and then rehearsals for a local theater company's production of High School Musical. And then. . .And then. . .And then. . .And then after 2 months of not tracking and having ice cream or frozen yogurt almost every day of the summer I went back to WW and had a very disturbing weigh in at 164!!! OMG. . .WTF. . .
My few pound weight gain in April/May that I started reversing was now a major weight gain and instead of having lost 25.6, as of July 14th I was at 164, having lost 13.8. . having gained 11.8 pounds between April and July 14th.
Well, I can happily say that as of 2 weeks ago I am back on track, weighing 162.4 for a 1oss of 15.4 pounds from when I started in November (yet, almost a little more than 10 pounds more then my lowest of 152.2 in April).
Did I quit and start again? Gosh, that sounds so harsh. ..I don't think I quit because I really thought I was eating relatively ok. I wasn't eating the junk food. I wasn't eating fast food. I wasn't having fried food. What I wasn't doing was working out - I stopped making my way to the gym or the living room for a workout video in June. I also wasn't tracking and I wasn't drinking my water and I was eating too much and certainly enjoying way too much frozen yogurt and ice cream. I wasn't mindful of my eating at all.
I am embarrassed to tell you that sometimes I went with Allie & her friends for gelato after camp and then after dinner when my husband suggest frozen yogurt, I didn't say no.
But I have gotten back on track and so instead of saying I quit, I'd like to say I took a detour. Because to stay I am starting over again meant I quit and I really don't think I quit. And truthfully, I am really sick of stopping and starting diets over and over again. I was just lost for a bit.
I now know if I bite it, I need to write it. . .just because I think I am doing "okay" food wise, doesn't mean I am when I really have no clue what I have eaten and am not tracking. I also need to know that life doesn't always have the same schedule and will change and often get crazy and to be able to stay on track during those times is when I know I have truly conquered my food battles.
But no, I didn't quit and restart. ..the ups and downs are just part of my weight loss journey and my last detour hopefully made me a little more aware and a little smarter for the next time life wreaks havoc on my schedule and routine. And I am finding with a child who likes to play the guitar, participate in musical theater and play soccer, balancing all that with the homework of a 5th grader is never going to be easy and calm and routine like. . .
But for now, I have had a really good two weeks - eating within points, tracking and working out 11 out of the last 12 days for a minimum of 30 minutes and have drank at least 64 ounces of water for the past week. . .this is a good part of the journey.
